May Memories (My preemie experience)

Maybe May is very memorable to me. 12 years ago this month I was a successful college student working at the Board of education for Prince George’s County Public schools. I was 5 months pregnant and happy about my future.

My daughter was due September 19th 2005!  I was happy and scared at the same time as a first time Mom.

I visited Holy Cross in the beginning of May and loved the hospital and couldn’t wait. I packed my Mom bag but had no idea that I wouldn’t be in that hospital having my baby in September.

I would have my baby on June 13th on my Mothers 50th birthday. The Gemini twins literally, life is funny.

I had big plans for Memorial weekend. I couldn’t wait to get off work. I got home as soon as I could and the next thing you know my water broke.

I was confused because I was not expecting this so soon. My stay at Holy Cross would last for weeks with most of my amniotic fluid gone. I could feel every movement of my unborn child. 

When I got to the hospital they told me to move in. I stayed, I waited, I counted down the days on my calendar and finally the day came.

I woke up and called my Mom on her birthday. All I remember is saying with enthisiam dispite where I was “Happy birthday Mom!” 

The next thing I know, I felt my daughter inside of me literally flip around. I paged the nurse. They rushed me to have a sonogram done and low and behold she was breached. An emergency C section was the next step. 

Well, what a gift. In life you can’t prepare for the unknown or unexpected. You can plan all you want but life has a funny way of showing you, you do not have control. 

The sad part is that because I had my child so early she had to be in the neonatal ward. I could not look at my baby when I was laying down. All I saw was an empty corner in my room. I had to be escorted by wheelchair to see my daughter.

I could barely hold her. We had skin to skin time. I would tuck her in my shirt and comfort her fragile body. I couldn’t breast feed her directly so all I could do was pump milk into bottles as she was tube fed.

When I left the hospital it was the most difficult thing to leave without my child but visit with countless bottles of breast milk daily from Largo Maryland to Silver Spring Maryland for 5 months.

I took a CPR class and was also told to notify the local fire department that I had a preemie on a monitor at home. 

I’m glad I took CPR. I’m glad I notified the fire department because little did I know I would need both in the near future.

I was so excited when my daughter came home even though she had an sleep apnea monitor  attached to her. The monitor would beep when she would stop breathing and it beeped frequently which was scary.

She was home for a week. She was 6 pounds and to me she still looked small. I mean she could barely fit in the car seat.

One morning as I placed her in her car seat and gave her her medicine she began to choke. She was turning light grey. I immediately took her out the seat performing CPR as my Mom called 911.

She was unresponsive and then finally gasped for air after I performed CPR. The ambulance came and she was taken to PG Hospital and later transported to a secluded section at Holy Cross. She stayed there for 3 weeks.

I was beyond traumatized, and worried. My daughter almost died in my arms. I thank God everyday for my miracle baby. She will be 12 next month.

God is good!

After 12 years of watching her grow into a beautiful pre teen I remain hopeful that in life you will have struggles but through it all you will prevail.

Thanks for reading my story.

Live Life Uninterrupted